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Friday, October 17, 2008

Good morning, world. I am writing from my favorite corner of the main dance studio at CSU Fresno. Great facility, part of it shown above. These days are going by at the speed of light. 6am rehearsals almost daily followed by long days of school and work. I am just about worn out. This week, in particular, has been the week from Haites. Were Baz Luhermann to knock on my door tomorrow to request the making of a film of my life to this point, sure as sunshine, the final scene would be a montage of me breaking into hysterical laughter and sobbs back and forth all week.
It's midterm week. It also happens to be the week my big term paper is due in Gerontology (like an idiot with no foresight, I selected the subject: "The Burden of the Care-Giver". Can we say "most depressing ten pages EVER"?!). The coup de grace, a weekend performance in The Central Valley Dance Festival, presenting a piece that my choreographer cannot make up her mind about. We have learned this piece four times over, she has changed it so much (even in the rehearsal that ended an hour ago... We Are Performing This TOMORROW)! Kill me now.

I was looking forwad to Sunday, when I can finally relax and begin a new, calm week, until one fellow-student reminded me what happens after Midterms. WE KEEP GOING! Obviously, we all knew this. But somehow, when she said this, it took hold of my stomach and pulled down, HARD. We have decided that midterms are, indeed, FAR worse than finals because of the simple fact that the semester only becomes more intense thereafter. I am accustomed to preparing for a big concert around finals, holding my breath with the end in sight. This semester, having a huge show smack in the middle of things is acting as a strange illusion. I am ready to be done, yet there is SO much more to come. Ealier in the week, I was attempting to calculate how long it would be before I would be able to get more than four hours of sleep per night again. My initial finding was Saturday night. That may be true, but Monday fast approacheth and I must have four minutes of choreography freshly painted to my body for display Monday night. Sunday will be church and prep.
Work is work. I still love and hate my job. Despite the busy schedule, I am maintaining decent grades. I have earned A's on all my midterms so far, and my overall grades should still reflect that. Halfway there. Lots of Prop 8 work going on. I feel pretty terrible about my lack of involvment, aside from my monetary contributions. My roommate suggested that I simply spread the word at school and work. Ha. Attempt to spread the word on Prop 8 in the THEATRE ARTS department of my school and I will have immediately burned every bridge I have developed there. Spread it at work where I may get an abundant response of agreement, but if my boss finds out, I'm dead. and she will find out. The official language of my place of business is not English, it's Gossip. Still, I can do my part in small ways.
That's all I've got. Miss you all. To those of you headed to Utah this weekend, you stink for choosing this moment in time. Give Aunt Jeanie a few HUGE hugs for me, toss Wendy a Hi Five, hug the Wibergs an extra time for me and tell Grandma I love her very much. And trip anyone I didn't mention that you might see there. Oh, I meant hug. Hug them. Not trip.
Sleepy Laura. Time to move on with writing that term paper. Tonight will be an all-nighter (oh, go on and shake that finger at me all you want. I have proven over the past decade that I produce my best material under a reasonable amount of pressure. I promise I will get the highest grade in the class!)
Namaste.

4 comments:

The VerNooy's said...

YOU ARE AMAZING!!!!! I really do not know how you do it!!! oh, and we would like to come watch and support you at your next performance, but we do not know when or where it is. :( Good luck with everything. You should be exceedingly glad its FRIDAY!!!! But maybe your not, but I would be if my midterms would be over. The semester will end before you know it.

NLBlack said...

Ditto Vernooy's remark.

Now I'm feeling guilty.....we just got back from our 35th anniversary trip and I spent two days lounging by Pinecrest, watching Steve fish and reading a book. (I'm sure you didn't need to hear that). However, I will tell you that I DO understand the whirlwind pressure-no sleep for weeks - no time to breathe lifestyle. Been there, done that. I, too, was a performing arts major.

Hang in there and let me know how the show went last night. Sorry we were away.

NLBlack said...

I just read a quote that is perfect for you this week!


"Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass.....

It’s about learning to dance in the rain!"

Laura said...

Mom-
If 35 years of marraige (CONGRATULATIONS, AND HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!) doesn't deserve at least a two-day vacationin Pinecrest for you, I don't know what does! And I'm fairly certain that you INVENTED the "all-nighter". I don't know anyone who works as hard as you! If I had to pick one person who I know would understand how I felt this past week, it would have been you without a second thought.

I love you.